When counselling with Michael you can expect:
You can seek counselling for:
Life Skills & Life Coaching
... as a very brief example, if one has not learned to push back assertively and kindly, then the usual options are to blow up or clam up. Neither will be very useful. See the Life Skills page for more examples
... there are 6 likely causes of depression, and to tackle these it is first necessary to find out exactly which one, or ones are the cause. There are also a number of ways of thinking that will make one depressed. Stinky thinking leads to stinky emotions! No, it is not that simple, but with the right help the faulty thinking can be Traced, Faced and then Replaced.
...can be in a simplified form explained as "Undue fear and worry in the absence of reasonable cause". Anxiety is awful, and debilitating. When the mind is taught healthy thinking, the hideous feelings are mastered.
... is so highly addictive, and with well over 100 poisonous chemicals in each breath it poisons the body - sloooowly. Added to this the smoker soon learns many sub-conscious lies ("I can give up whenever I want" etc.) that overpower any desire or will-power to give up. After years of trying and other forms of trying to quit, people have come to counselling, we go through each lie one by one and finally the inner person is strengthened enough to quit - permanently...
Burnout / Breakdown
...having a breakdown is not nice, and if you are stressed one can so easily be blind to how serious it is becoming and how close to the mental-cliff-edge one is walking. Before it gets serious there are many tell-tail signs, that can be seen with help and self-awareness. Burnout is a pre-cursor to breakdown and brown-out is a pre-cursor to burnout. But, what does brown-out look like?
I call anger - An outward outpouring on an inward emotion - But what is the name of that emotion? Before we get angry there are emotions inside that we probably never considered were there. To not become angry Insights and Awareness are necessary and have to be learned. Oh, and by the way, have you ever realised that no one else can ever actually make you angry? That is something you do all by yourself, so it is up to the individual to own this problem and do the work on themselves - and stop blaming others!
Getting Centred (SO IMPORTANT!)
Some are people pleasers and jump to other peoples expectations, and other people are intrusive and want to be served. One we call other-centred and the other self-centred. To become just a centred-person is very refreshing as one just dances to ones own tune, and has the skills to ward off the intrusive person or to not need others to perform for you!
Compulsive behaviour and OCD
This covers a wide range of mental / emotional issues, and there are always reasons for this behaviour whether is is eating, spending, sexual or anger (there are more!). Just behind each behaviour are emotions and just behind that are a set of beliefs. That is why this form of counselling is called Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT). For healing to come, ALL areas will need working on, not just one. Insights AND strategy are vital.
Phobias and Mind-Panic
Usually rooted in past / childhood trauma, these oldest of emotions kick in hard and the mind then reels. Behind all this are the rarely challenged sub-conscious assumptions. What is the feeling you are running from, and where is this feeling coming from - are two powerful questions to ask before you start a new journey of liberation...
Grief / Loss
Grief and hard times in life are unavoidable, but one can get stuck in grief and it can be hard to move on. Grief can become a scar on our soul, and if it continues will require professional help to process and become free from, otherwise we are deemed to enter the future constantly burdened.
Resentment, Bitterness and Anger - How to forgive and trust again?
One of my fridge magnets has the insight - Resentment, Bitterness and Anger are like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die! When the soul has taken offence at someone, and is hanging on that person to make it right - much of the time disappointment will follow. Time to process these emotions and find a way to release ourselves from this painful prison? There are vital insights needed to be able to forgive, and then there is the subject of trust: How is one to trust again, and to also stay safe in the future?
I feel therefore I am, the modernistic belief that will ensnare! This has been called the number one cause of emotional instability. Feelings can indeed be lying to us, and need to be constantly checked to see it they are reflecting reality. Paranoia, Bi-Polar, and other mental disorders are based on being led by feelings that are not in check. There is more however...
Living with the Crazy Maker
"He or She is driving me crazy!". I hear this in the counselling room on a regular basis, and yes, some people have learned some very nasty tricks (actually they are survival-kits) that will indeed drive you to despair. There are 19 of these practices in the book that this insecure person will draw as easily as their next breath to try to control you. And, yes, if you live with one, work with one or have one in your circle - you will need to seriously up-skill to be able to continue to live with them.
Education is Short term pain for long term gain. It can also be a hard journey, with worries of its own. Debt, ability, fear of failure and sometimes panic attack and anxiety. Facing the mountain can certainly be done with planning, management skills and the right encouraging Truth Coached to be built up with. And just in case it has already turned to custard, remember, failure is not fatal, it is just a temporary setback.
Careers come and go. Why do we imagine that a career is for life? (that was in the old days!). I can help you face the disappointment of a career ending or having ended, and find the wisdom and coaches needed to find the energy and inspiration needed to kick oneself into the future.
Toxic Groups / Workplaces
I am fascinated by something I call the Group Psych, or group scripting, or group conformity. These can be in a workplace, family, church, club - or anywhere there are more than one person. They can be sweet, safe, inspiring places to be, or it can be toxic, backstabbing, and psychologically unsafe. The easy test is this: How stressed do you feel being in this group?
Our Life can be divided into stages, and at each stage there can be stress in facing the changes necessary, and adjusting to the new stage. These stages are very roughly 5, 12, 20, 30, 45, 60yrs etc. Mid-life crisis is not the only one, but entering old age, starting married life, or first career etc...
Motivation & Becoming a Success
Why is it that some will become successful and others not? Why is it that some will seek change, coaching and counselling, while others are prepared to stay the same, or even stuck. “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak” is a Biblical saying that gives us a hint into this subject. Motivation is a huge part of our psych, and with the right insights the sky is the limit to what you can become...
And much more...
There are many more areas that counselling can help with. Whatever the area of change you are facing, please feel free to give me a call, use the contact form, or just take the plunge and book an appointment. The motto for Wisdom Counselling is: " ...wise counsel for people embracing change..."